The dating scene is really a hard game to play. If you think only ladies have it bad well think again. In fact it may be safe to say that men have it worse when it comes to feeling the pangs of disappointment that comes with joining the dating game. Why? Because relatively, men are the ones who have to work for it. They are the ones who go after someone. They are the ones who soothe. Women were born to be found but it is for the men to find them.

And look for them we do. Everybody searches for the perfect someone. For us, it is the perfect lady. The girl of our dreams. That stunning woman. Whichever metaphor suits it best. The point is that you can hardly take away the image of this perfect being away from a man. Every man has it. He has a vision of what his perfect lady is like. The way she looks, the way she speaks, the way she moves…these things are desired in the minutest detail. These are used as the standards.

This is how we search for her. I know it may sound a little too over-reaching but it is the way it is. We have this idea on how the perfect girl is like so we search for these characteristics in the girls that we meet. This, in a way, keeps us in track but on the other poses our greatest “downfall” in our search for the one.

How you may ask? It’s because most men fail to realize that it is very hard to actually find someone who will possess all of the characteristics that he is looking for. They tend to “disqualify” very early when they meet women.

Disqualifying a woman means casting her off aside immediately because you think that you would just be wasting your time if you attempt to build a relationship with her. This happens when a man sees a trait in her that doesn’t coincide with his perfect girl persona.

The problem here lies in the fact that these types of men have a rigid idea of what a relationship must be like. Relationship with a woman must be build from the ground up, not handed to you on a silver platter. The same goes for women. There will inevitably be things that would annoy or irritate you about her but the truth is, men who have amazing relationships are the ones flexible enough to work around them. A perfect couple accepts each other’s insecurities and foibles effectively enough to maintain their relationship. You can’t do that if your mind is set on an imaginary ethereal image rather than the one who is actually with you.

Knowing what you want in woman is good. I’m not denying that. But what I’m saying is that you must learn how to keep an open mind. Living in this world has probably taught you that hardly anything is perfect so don’t start deluding yourself now. Okay deluding might be too strong a word but you get what I mean.